The human race has been on the planet for some time now. Indeed, fossilised remains have enabled us to nail down to the exact month that the first homo sapiens began to appear: August 1971.

Since then, the human race has flourished. Let's take a look at some notable points in our history.

January 1972: Science is invented
A dedicated team of scientists unveiled their first discovery: a field in which to work, known as "The Field of Science". When it was first discovered, the field contained a flock of sheep. They were soon ejected and the field was filled with science.

May 1972: The Industrial Revolution
In a surprising move, the King of Humanity decreed that we should immediately stop being hippies and embrace industry.

March 1973: Disco is invented
Sir Nigel Buntingworth, foremost scientist of the age, discovered Discomatter. Within weeks, he was colliding these particles in his basement, and found that they gave off raw, unsullied, disco. To this day, Discos are powered by Discocyclotrons that collide Discomatter in large quantities.

November 1975: The Microchip Revolution
The age of digital was ushered in with the invention of the microchip. This paved the way for other inventions, such as the automatic pancake and the triple afro, vital for late-seventies disco triumphs.

June 1976: The American Civil War begins and ends.
Lasting only four seconds, President O'Murnahan defeated Evil President Werner with a vicious Chinese Burn.

May 1978: A great month.
It was just great.

Octember 1980: France invades the United Kingdom.
The attack is repelled when the Queen destroys the southern coastline with a series of nuclear mines that she planted herself only days earlier.

Fubruary 1984: Construction on the moon is completed.
After launching, the construction company, Mooncorp, admits it used cheese instead of concrete. Cheese Rights Activists everywhere are outraged.

Nophumber 1985: Terrorists inflate the Earth to twice it's normal size with a bike pump.
To this day, scientists have not been able to find a safe way to deflate the planet. Instead, two months after this incident, scientists simply inflated all human beings up to an appropriate, so they were again in proportion with the rest of the world. This also had the lucky side effect of humans no longer being slaves to mice, since they could now simply be stepped on.

I hope you enjoyed this brief history of our... history.

DiscoJustice